Archive | June, 2010

And Fish Don’t Blink.

30 Jun

When you stare out into the universe, the universe stares back.

Now, imagine a fish.

The philosophical statement and the concept of a fish fit into a common associative category, or at least, it feels like the two fit together better than they don’t fit together.

I’m still reading Memories, Dreams & Reflections by Carl Jung, and once again, a simple statement he made in passing warped my mind into a whirlpool.  He was describing a dream of his with a fish which he referred to as “…an unconscious and mute fish…”

It seems strange to me that unconscious and mute were explicitly stated: both are implicit assumptions when conceptualizing a fish. From there my mind wandered, wondering if unconscious and mute were used to describe the fish as a literary function, like an inverted mirror, functioning to point out to the reader that the non-fish and human characters in the dream are vocal and conscious creatures.

When you stare out into the universe, the universe stares back; however, the sense or feeling of the universe staring back is elusive and evades all quantification and calculations that could prove this using the scientific method. Such is the way of transcendental beliefs and a test of spiritual resolve: faith is acknowledged in silence.

A fish underwater may stare at the surface, and from above one may stare back. However, the mute and unconscious fish does not know the presence as the presence knows it, sensing it yet not with a mutual understanding.

Infinity is two-sided. Staring into the universe is the infinite, and staring into the unconscious is infinitesimal: macro and micro representations of infinity.

Truth is constantly unfolding, and at this moment the above statement is my closest understanding in investigating my associate between the philosophical statement and the idea of a fish.

Midsummer Night’s Dream

30 Jun

In the 9th grade, my world literature teacher assigned a task of memorization: every student assumed a monologue or soliloquy from Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream, and preformed the piece in front of the class.  I was 14 years old. Eight years wedge time passed between Then and Now. Since the very day I realized that I have forgotten the monologue, the sing song meter of the lyric continues to torture me, half synced in a diluted memory.

Today, I went on a very long walk and found a paperback only bookstore that I had never seen before. With books spilling out the windows and overflowing buckets, who wouldn’t have entered? I stumbled upon a copy of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, and flipped through the pages searching for the monologue I remember that I forgot. And I found it! Finally! I read it with the fluency of riding a bicycle. I am archiving this re-discovery for myself so next time the meter sticks in my mind, I can try to recite the words right out of my head. Without further ado:


Set your heart at rest:
The fairy land buys not the child of me.
His mother was a votaress of my order:
And, in the spiced Indian air, by night,
Full often hath she gossip’d by my side,
And sat with me on Neptune’s yellow sands,
Marking the embarked traders on the flood,
When we have laugh’d to see the sails conceive
And grow big-bellied with the wanton wind;
Which she, with pretty and with swimming gait
Following,–her womb then rich with my young squire,–
Would imitate, and sail upon the land,
To fetch me trifles, and return again,
As from a voyage, rich with merchandise.
But she, being mortal, of that boy did die;
And for her sake do I rear up her boy,
And for her sake I will not part with him.

Collected Clippings Archive

29 Jun

“When you stare into an abyss … the abyss also stares into you”. -Nietzsche

“We are all free to live in illusion, and we are all free to Seek the Truth.” -Unknown“There is an endless net of threads throughout the universe. The horizontal threads are in space. The vertical threads are in time. At very crossing of the threads there is an individual. And every individual is a crystal bead. And every crystal bead reflects not only the light from every other crystal in the net, but also every other reflection throughout the entire universe.”        – The Rig Veda

“He who breathed life into man, breathed from Himself. Therefore one’s soul comes from the essence of G-d.” -Unknown

Paradox in Boxes

28 Jun

Paradox in Boxes

A BeMused by Design Production
Music by Devotchka, "How it Ends"


28 Jun

The following excerpt from Alan Schneider’s book Doors in Disguise builds on his discussion of the Creation Diagram. This diagram, shown on the left of the page, includes the seven major chakras and the triad, diad, and monad. In this excerpt, he relates this diagram with conscious existence.


Alan Schneider

One of the interesting characteristics which can be noted about the symbols on the Creation Diagram is the fact that they all display what the biological sciences refer to as radial symmetry, that is, they all are uniformly constructed around a central point. And the symbols of the Diagram can be said to be harmonically balanced around a common axis. In theory, a radially symmetrical element can be rotated around the central symmetrical axis up to the rate at which the material of which it is composed can no longer remain intact against the resultant centrifugal forces as these increase with that rate. At this point of transition, the element fragments, usually by exploding apart.

The symbols of the Creation Diagram are ideal forms and therefore are not subject to physical destruction. Their “rate of rotation” is shown as “zero” in order to clearly reveal their esoteric form to the Seeker. But in the manifest condition of dense form in the physical plane of expression, all of the symbols are always acting in rotation. This movement is the vibration of consciousness which we experience as the world. Consciousness can be characterized as an interactive vibration of complex physical, spiritual, and mental forms. This is directly related to the combined rates and direction of rotation of the Creation Symbols. When we observe any phenomenon, whether simple or complex, we are always “registering” a global recognition of that phenomenon’s composite vibration, which is composed of the interaction of all the rates and directions of rotation of all of the Creation Symbols which are active in the phenomenon’s consciousness expression. We may or may not be aware of this perception, but it is nonetheless occurring, and the Seeker can make great progress by focusing on the world of events in this way. Additionally, I feel constrained to mention here again that everything is a form of consciousness originating in the Tetragrammaton, even a common pebble, a speck of dust, or an atom.

“We are all free to live in illusion, and we are all free to Seek the Truth.”

Ode to the Right Hemisphere

26 Jun

The following Idea Worth Spreading shared at a TEDx conference moved tears to my eyes. I find it meaningful, and I hope for anyone else who watches this, meaning can continue to flow from this shared experience. A little over a year ago, I experienced a concussion to a similar part of my brain as Jill Bolte Taylor, and I personally relate to some of the sensation and experiences in the aftermath of head trauma Taylor describes. She tells her personal story in a moving way, and it inspires me to continue to individuate and strengthen my own resolve and voice as well.

Jill Bolte Taylor\’s Stroke of Insight

Also, this famous neuroscientist I first was exposed to a few years ago in a Cognitive Psychology course popped into my life again today. He’s kind of like Steve of Blues Clues, but with neuroscientific riddles.

Ramachandran on Phantom Limbs, Synesthesia, etc.

Strange Awakening

24 Jun

Today, my consciousness began before I awoke. What strange dreams! I can recall a few dreams, but the last of the intermittent scenes strikes me as most peculiar. I was at a hotel conference, staring at a sign that advertised the next convention. This sign neither stated the purpose nor the discourse of the convention, only the location. I gained awareness that I was dreaming, and focused in on the sign. The sign spelled its message in perfect English, but somehow I knew the letters were scrambled. Within the string of cities was a hidden word, misspelled but purposefully so so it would remain hidden to viewers. At a glance the sign stated: Next Convention: Olympia & Vancouver.

My laser-like vision pulled the letters further apart, and I watched the hidden word shake and break free from its shackles, vibrating and thus, I imagine, simmering itself an ember red font. Eventually, the sign read: Next Convention: Olympia & Vanc[oracle]ver. For what felt like ten minutes, I tried to untangle the word oracle, and the letters, obedient as they are, flipped and switched until the sign read: Next Convention: Olympia & Vanc[oregon]uver.

Lightning struck and seized me from sleep. I sat upright erect, awake as day, and my right hand , knowing where it was going, bolted to press against my temporal lobe. With my hand fused to a point behind my right ear. My lips followed the lead of my hand, knowing what they wanted to say: “Temporal lobe seizure.”

Awake, intrigued, and hoping to catch the tail end of sun rise, I got up and began to research temporal lobe seizures. Synchronicity propelled me in this intuitive path, for the relevancy of all that I read tied into recent events and interests of mine. The spot I clutched is mapped in the following image, labeled ‘temporal lobe.’ This spot is what neuroscience has deemed ‘the God spot’, and such simple seizures are not all that uncommon. In fact, Lewis Carol, Fyodor Dostoevsky, and Edgar Allen Poe all experienced such seizures. It just so happens that I have been reading Poe and watched a documentary (which didn’t mention his seizures) on Poe a few days ago, and Dostoevsky has provided me with a wealth of meaningful philosophic perspectives in his works, since I discovered his works a few months ago.

The Following Link provides more information about Temporal Lobe Seizures:

Ellen White\’s Head Injury

BeMused Design on Adobe’s Featured Blog Website!!

23 Jun

Thank you to any and all of those of you out there who have supported the energy I put into design -be they visual or ideological. BeMused was recently featured on Adobe’s design website as a Featured Blog. Check it out!

BeMused Featured on Adobe\’s Featured Blog Site

~Emily (Creator, BeMused Design)

Soul Searching

23 Jun

An idea struck me, and like a vessel with an opposable thumb, I will try to relay the message that shook me, through me, onto paper:

What if souls are oscillating travelers amongst and between the powerful forces of the universe–similar to plasma forms in a lava lamp.The soul’s energy manifests as matter, and eventually transforms back into energy, etc. When the energy takes shape as a body, the place on the trajectory path – ascending or descending- from soul to soul.

Personally, I feel as though I was born an old soul. Perhaps I rested on the abstraction of age, and a more accurate conceptualization for this sentiment and knowing of experiences I’ve yet to occur in this life, is that I was born from the crux ascending upwards from lowest point of decent. What if…?

Self Portrait Painting

22 Jun

“Free door” read the cardboard sign wilting and weathered against the blank white expression of the orphan item on the side of the road.

My motions followed through in this sequences: adoption, expression, capture a picture of the painting in progress, recreated the piece through a multiple exposure of that photograph with a graphic I designed of the eye of hours: a continuously evolving self-portrait that’s changed, change and changing.

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Being John Malcovich

22 Jun

Due to my difficulties suspending belief as a film viewer, I stick to the silver screen productions that

a) are documentaries, which don’t tend to dress up reality in a top hat and sell that false image as reality to top hatless consumers; or,

b) don’t expect the viewer to take the plot/setting/time/space as a authentic depiction of reality.

I recently watched Being John Malcovich–even for me, the film was twisted and strange. In a makes-me-ponder-this-perspective good way.  When Malcovich enters Malcovich’s mind/body portal and finds that the entire world is him and he is the entire world, I was struck at the profundity. From this, I took: there is no true distinction amongst man, and we are one human body at large; and one can only know another as deeply as one has a knowledge of self.

A movie review from the Associated Content has this to say:

Being John Malcovich begins Craig doing puppetry. The act, titled “The Dance of Despair and Disillusion”, shows the Craig marionette smashing a mirror. I think the title of the puppet show is a parallel to

Craig’s life, and the breaking of the mirror represents Craig destroying his own identity to be John Malcovich.

In most of the articles I have read about the movie, Craig is made out to be a villain for “trying to play God”. Craig does eventually use Malcovich just like a puppet, and of course, “to enter a man’s mind is the ultimate puppeteering experience” (Ebert).

There are some exceptions to the “anti-Craig” critics, including David Bruce.

Bruce defends Craig by saying “if given god-like qualities, we would use them for our own selfish gains.” Almost anyone is Craig’s position would have done the same thing. Deep down, this is the way most people really are. We could not have the power to control and manipulate someone’s life like that and not take full advantage of it. Another important point made by Bruce is that “for a film that has nothing to do with religion or god, it is a profoundly spiritual and theological story.”

This film makes a powerful statement “about the restraint of god” (Bruce’s words, not mine) because we are free to make our own choices and mistakes with “no strings attached” (Bruce 2).

Van Gogh’s Sunflowers

21 Jun

Although Van Gogh’s sunflower paintings are very similar in many aspects, each stands out as its own unique work of art. Van Gogh began painting sunflowers after he left Holland for France in pursuit of creating an artistic community.

The colors are vibrant and express emotions typically associated with the life of sunflowers: bright yellows of the full bloom to arid browns of wilting and death; all of the stages woven through these polar opposites are presented. Perhaps this very technique is what draws one into the painting; the fulfillment of seeing all angles of the spectrum of life and in turn reaching a deeper understanding of how all living things are tied together.

Note: The center “eye” of the flower contains different colors. In the first example the center is filled with a greenish yellow, while in the second piece the center is filled with black.

Angel Echos [Jon Hopkins remix]

21 Jun

Four Tet, Angel Echos [Jon Hopkins remix]

Upcoming producer/DJ Jon Hopkins recently released an uplifting ambient remix of Four Tet’s Angel Echoes. Click the soundcloud above to play and download this remix.

Bedside Lava Lamp

20 Jun

I found my old lava lamp a few weeks ago. The fire-lit blue plasma ‘lava’ bubbles warp shape and gnash forms inside a cone, filled with clear malleable water/air like substance . The clear substance captures my intrigue: similar to describing water in a fishbowl, what the filler fluid is by description is elucidated by what the bubbles are not. The clear fluid lacks corporeal form, and put positively, is the present absence of the capricious lava as it heats and cools.

My thoughts cast a net before my feet, and if I cannot bring myself in the teetering moment of hubris to regain humility, I trip in my own trap. Falling is a torpedo, a whirlpool, a black hole astray from the light, and into the darkness. It is a pattern, this type of descent. Slipping is often set off through the making of  a mistake: not for the first time, but for the nth time. Before the fall, the sway precedes the slip. The sway is where I lose a sense of I, and I am taken over despite myself, to spite myself. To flirt with temptation and sway towards the pattern is to set oneself up for a fight, for the pull of temptation towards that trigger, is a vice hungry for a device, and that grip is waiting with white knuckles and the forces of gravity and magnets.

Conversely, I have found that in the moments or flow of moments in which I am living my passion, I am participating in something greater. To practice one’s passion is to participate and honor universal compassion.  This experience is the antithesis of vice finding device. A perfect pair, the hand fits into the glove snug as snug is, and the experience of touch and to be touched is muted and diluted just the same. The virtue of compassion and the vice of device are similar in that they can be defined against one another: a binary opposition,  like the white fluid around the blue lava bubbles ascending and descending inside of the lamp.

Sometimes when I cannot sleep I watch the shadow play on my ceiling cast by the lava lamp beside me. It is astonishing how remarkably similar the lava shadows are to the caprice of free willed hands, not moving with grace and fluent rhythm, but rather, spastic and sporadic motion and agile jutting with and against the nature of its own movement, as if the shadows have intent or purpose unfolding in their dance.

Strangely, to watch the lava itself, rather than the shadows, makes me feel quite uneasy. As if I am seeing something that I should not be seeing. As if I walked in on a secret and instead of closing the door and moving along with a fleeting apology, I let my curiosity and fascination with that quixotic sensation get the best of me and I lay and stare with full moon eyes.

Noteworthy Add-on:

Digital signals are imprinted with a picture of their destination from the beginning of their journey towards their end. Carl Jung had the good fortune of opening his first private practice in part due to the word of mouth rumor of Jung’s wizardry, spread by a mentally ill local patient. He could not have known his life would lead the path it did, and the improvisational set his life apart from many others. Am I an analogue girl in a digital world?

Lit from above, Lit from within

19 Jun

If you watch, this clip is well worth listening to her speech until the ending applause.

Elizabeth Gilbert Talks about Creativity

Amy Tan on Creativity, \’Save a Fish From Drowning\’

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