Archive | December, 2010

New Year Transitions

31 Dec

Fluxes Stasis Adaption Vibration

Patience Creation Belief Action

Faith Dynamism



Happy New Years!



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Security Deposit [Free Write]

29 Dec

The palpitating heart inside my chest scares me. I feel so good. My body however is collapsing. I am concerned one of these may not be followed by another. I am colder every day. Muscles ache, joints clench, and its so strange to feel myself growing physically weaker when my mind and emotions are finding strength and balance within themselves, taking every morning, a gift, as it comes, each day another chance to get it right this time. If I do not wake then so it is–I do not fear death. But I am motivated on behalf of my self-concern to document it. Moving places, changes jobs, changing seasons, changing years. I feel strong. When is my body going to catch itself up?

Last Night [FREE WRITE]

28 Dec

Dream Journey

Dreams are limited by the dreamer’s conscious experiences. Senses inform consciousness during the waking day; consciousness informs senses during dreams.

A sensation, that is, a fully integrated internal inclination, a feeling, fills in the blank slate of logic like a white canvas oozing bold colors.

Third morning of sickness within the past week. Today I leaned out the side of the city bus, relieved my sickness, and sat back down inside the bus. Another time, I woke up a fingernail past sunrise to do reike and yoga with a friend before he left for break. We spent most of the time talking. There, in my front yard before 9 am, I started dry heaving nothing, nothing, something– definitely not food but I definitely was sick.

I had my fingerprints scanned today, all ten. Apparently, I only have 9 fingerprints. one refuses to register.  The livescan man digitally re-scanned it time and again until, finally, I am under the impression (not punny) that we just settled.

9 fingerprints. 3 mornings of sickness. A sensation. A reality? No, but the appearance of a potential.

A Tribute to Bus 37: To the West, To the East

27 Dec

Deadmau5 – Limit Break

24 Dec

quirky-quarky & topsy-turny

22 Dec

Photons have both inertial and gravitational mass (even though they have zero rest mass) and exhibit all the characteristics of material bodies. Electromagnetism is as material as breath, and an equally incredible candidate for the vital field.

Coming Home [Diddy ft. Skylar Grey]

22 Dec

Coming Home [Diddy ft. Skylar Grey]

Recognizance out of Order [free write]

21 Dec

To recognize, one must have a cognizant memory of a prior encounter.

The current of linearity pulls tides of time, impairing true vision as blinders focus a horses panorama. The wild is tamed and can now act; the wild is focused; the wild is not subject to its own reactions.

Granted, I have never seen a wild horse. And yet, the spirit of the wind and the wild horse are part of the grab-bag of things I already knew before I was born. To know them upon here-say without witness is blind faith. Is a shareholder in the testimony of miracles. Is devout intuition. To recognize, one may have a cognizant memory of a prior encounter; however, one may also have a conviction of blind faith founded not a leap and a feeling, and so it seems the premonition may precede the first cognizant encounter and like a de ja vu, position the encounter to produce a familiar resonance.

What is relevant wears reality’s mask. An illusory masquerade: we cannot see what is not relevant, that which we do not understand and have little or no exposure or experience with. How many eyes are you looking through in one situation to build a composite, omniscient perspective of this collective encounter? A new idea, friendship, understanding, self-discovery means awakening a detail in this compartmentalized world from its appearance to ourselves. Means awakening one idiosyncratic, break in the pattern bursting the seams of the familiar like harmony from dissonance, like a beach ball from underwater like a spirit from the struggle, like liberty from laze faire lifestyle. Alive from living.

I can’t sleep tonight. There was a strange charge and surge of energy wild within me after the lunar eclipse. I free wrote it out. Goodnight, moon.


20 Dec

Terrenchal Downpour Over Los Angeles [free write]

19 Dec

I know the rain. In Los Angeles, the rain comes in the form of storms, buckets of water drenching the air and hitting  the grisly, dismal and grease stained gray of gravel and pavement with the violent smack of pelts on the river.

The rain today is particularly intent on falling. Determined and persistent this storm is relentless and there is something about this storm that makes me wonder. Curious and curiouser.

It feels as if the sky is a sieve with a valve and when the holes open there is an oceanic wealth of water to gush with the force of propulsion through the holes. The bodies of water that evaporate to refill the fallen supply of sky water are similar to a pot on a stove. Boiling, percolating, steaming, releasing, re-start.

Life is a process of learning oneself and every oneself because we are one self and so selflessly we serve all when we look within with honesty and compassion and then extend that inner lens to the eyes we encounter. I made mistakes. I drifted away from my center. I have made mistakes. I am learning, though. I am healing. Everyday is another chance to get it right this time.

Imagery Stasis – Imagination Fluxes

18 Dec

BeMused by Design ©

After the Fall [BeMused by Design Photography]

17 Dec

Snake Symbol Significance in Dreams

11 Dec

Jung stated, ‘The idea of transformation and renewal by means of the serpent is a well-substantiated archetype. It is [a] healing [symbol]’ (Jung 7, par. 184)

The Ouroboros, or Snakes as Symbols of Spiritual Growth and Transformation

The ouroboros, the snake forever swallowing its own tail, is a famous alchemical symbol of transformation. Jung saw the ouroboros much like he saw the mandala, as an archetypal template of the psyche symbolizing eternity and the law of endless return. Instead of looking at life as a finite game played between the bookends of birth and death, the ouroboros symbolizes a dynamic state of change and purification.

A literal ouroboros isn’t necessary for a dream to have its symbolic meaning. Since waking life snakes routinely shed their skins, they are ready made symbols for change and transformation. Dreams where snakes shed skin or seeing snake skins in a dream also symbolize change and transformation. Old, outgrown behavioral patterns, relationships, or even careers may be sloughed off in favor of a new skin more appropriate to the dreamer’s growth.

This process of adjustment may not be comfortable. In waking life, snakes get cranky and irritable during the shedding process and the same may be true for the dreamer. All change involves the surrender of the comfortable and even when changes promise progress, trading the known for the unknown involves a disquieting abandonment of the familiar.

Dream Snakes as Fear Symbols

A lack of firsthand experience with snakes makes the serpent a creature representing a fear of the unknown. As such, snake dreams symbolize that unknown fear. The fear can be an intuitive warning or an unfounded anxiety about some undefinable, hidden something awaiting the dreamer in waking life.

Honest analysis of the waking life provides the key to deciphering snake dreams. Pursuing a life dream, especially an untried one, involves fear. It is tantamount that the dreamer considers whether that fear is founded, or if irrational anxiety is threatening the realization of a waking life dream.

Dream Journal [FREE WRITE/ RE-WRITE]

11 Dec

I have been There before in dreams. This Twilight Kingdom exists unbounded to time and space, residing in the immutable framework of what remains when the constructs and illusions of permanence all fall down. The infinite potential of its landscape is an eternal ideology. There exists in perpetual obliquity: There is, independent from the tenants and dwellers, thoughts and ideas,  that There supports.

I am Transient. My lifeline is a current that flows through the creek of a the crease between the layers of a folded world: the realms of Energy and Matter, or more lucidly, the realm of appearances and the realm of the illusion of appearances.

My life struggles to collect cohesive presence in either world all together. Thoughts, behaviors and cognitions can communicate beyond the divide but this has its disadvantages. Every thought falls from beyond the shadow of a doubt. Every feeling feigns an hysteric syndrome of unjustified dismissiveness, leading to sentimental expression weighted with the conviction of a parachute,  fastened to pack a punch in its articulation on the masked backs of thoughts or behaviors in order to cross back into the common reality. Typically, I express my feelings into the common reality using the cognitive-behavior anchor points grounded there. Thus, how I feel makes itself known in the common reality as either pieces of jigsaw logic or hasty, impulsive reactivity. Feelings are more often than not the odd man out left alone in a world outside of time in infinite space.  As a transient, I have gained access to trespass beyond the partisan, corporeal divide.

Here I appear again, as soon as I loop-swoop-disappear from There. What am I? A flippant holographic effect? An illusion? A lucid shoelace? A Pioneer? A purl stitch? Imagination my engine, feelings fuel the timeless travel, and a secret is masked behind the sensation that I am just as alive as a fragment of imagination as I am in this freckled sack of skin and bones.

I have been to this timeless location before, specifically. The dream is recurring with more depth and detail each time. Last night I was aware that I was dreaming: a transient dream and transient state, a Wanderer into a permanent place.

I: Fluxes :: There: Stasis.
I : Time Traveler :: There : Infinite Landscape.

For this reason, my subjection to my fear informed me that I am part of the corporeal, common reality world, simultaneously. There is void of fear. The present absence of fear stands out like silence within a song. I pause and my heart palpates as if it were compassionate for the stillness set in the lack of beat outside of myself, accordingly. The Fearless face There inform me that because I am experiencing fear There because I perceive the contact with one archetype that served as a fear evoking stimulus. My ear would fall deaf to the cry of my fear if my fear realized its own petty perception. If I could activate my 3rd eye to see the invisible presence of the great everything, I would see that the one fearful stimulus is actually everywhere, and all around me.

There was a snake by my foot in the dark, dusk lair of There. I was within the confines of my landlords dilapidated wooden, sunken ship of a broken series of bungalow settlements. There was a snake by my foot and I yelp for my landlords help in fear. He was working on a mast to mask the gusts of harsh winds from breaking an entry in the form of a great howl through the cracks between the wooden panels. He mentioned something about filtering  magnesium and oxides  through the mast (magnesium trapper) that the wind carries. This, he said definitively, is for our own protection.  He laughed at my irrational fear. Look around you, he said. You are surrounded by snakes. I did look, and I was surrounded by an astounding patchwork of piles of coiled snakes. He grins. How dumb to be scared of just one snake, that one snake, he said pointing to my original referent. You see one, fear that one, and are too blind to notice that what you fear is so much greater, the fears lie in piles around you. He said all of this with no fear of his pant leg touching the rattler of a snake. Get over your fear, and you can be free.

With that he vanished, and I awoke.

Dr. Dre – Kush ft. Snoop Dogg, Akon

10 Dec


Dr. Dre – Kush ft. Snoop Dogg, Akon

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